All of that being said, I still have just as many body and self-image issues as the next person. To be a small or underweight person and deign to say anything negative about your weight or body shape is to call upon the unholy, unmitigated, not to mention unwelcome acrimony from any bystanders that may be within ear shot. My feelings of inadequacy or not enjoying the way I look at any given moment are immediately invalidated and shot down because I don't need to lose weight or because someone else thinks that their body image issues are "better" than mine. Well here's my public "screw you".
Now there's a difference between someone trying to counter any self-deprecating comments with positive feedback. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about if I say something like "I'm not ready to put on a bathing suit in public" people will scoff and look at me like I just announced that I need a breast reduction.
I know I've announced my nerdy side several times throughout this blogging adventure, but believe it or not, it extends beyond just enjoying dorky things. I also do a lot of research and read up on a lot of random things that spike my curiosity. Spoiler Alert: It's a lot harder for skinny guys to gain any type of muscle mass or weight at all than it is for an over weight person to lose it.
Our society is extremely focused on fad diets and millions and millions of weight loss programs and products. It is most certainly more valued to be underweight than overweight...but that doesn't mean I like it. There are very few programs tailored towards small guys who just want to get a little more muscle mass and tone up a bit. Weight gain programs are almost entirely focused on body building...no thanks.
Throw-in gay male culture on top of already existing societal expectations and therein lies even more body image issues. We are surrounded by gorgeous, muscley, healthy, men whom go to the gym five times a week and look amazing. Don't believe me? Ask any straight woman who has ever been to a gay event...they will confirm the Adonis factor.
I'm starting to get off track here. My point is, I'm allowed to have my body image issues just as much as anybody else. And I'll have to work twice as hard and make twice as many life changes to get my body where I want it to be than the majority of men my age. So spare me the eye rolls, snark, and scoffs if I try to commiserate with you when you talk about what you would like to do to get healthier and look better.
I have found a pretty good program, after much hunting and research, that is an extremely customizable solution that combines diet and exercise directly related to your goals. It doesn't lean towards gaining or losing weight, it just adapts and tells you what you should do based on where you are and where you want to go. So I'm gonna try to give this one a shot and see what happens!
For now, I will leave you with a funny little ditty about weight:
BYEEEEEE!
Body image issues, in all their ugly forms, really mess with our heads. Thanks for sharing, Cory. A reminder to me to be kinder those with issues opposite of my own.
ReplyDeletePreach! When someone is expressing body image issues, the only acceptable responses are positive feedback/support or commiseration. Dismissing someone else's feelings/insecurities/hangups simply because one sees it as "less significant/real," is simply rude and counter-productive.
ReplyDeleteOh my GOD! I really feel like we need to do a rendition of this little ditty when you come home! Hilarious! Also, I love you!
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